Always say, I love you

For my 16th blog in January I'm veering off from "The List" and writing about something I've been thinking about lately.

I have a son, which y'all know. And as fellow parents are already aware of...raising kids...whether it's 1 or 10...is hard. We're molding, shaping and helping these little humans grow up to be fabulous adults. We already know from our own childhoods that we will eff up, somewhere along the way, and no matter how doting we are, how much organic, pesticide-free food we cram down their cute little throats and no matter how restricted their TV/Video games/Computer time is...we have already messed them up somewhere along the line. That's a fact, Jack.

I was thinking of the things my parents did or didn't do...they didn't make me feel empowered to have my own opinion, they did not discipline with a plan, they were not consistent. I don't remember those "Leave it to Beaver" heart-to-heart talks. I actually used to ground MYSELF when I was little...because so often, besides a spanking, there were little to no consequences to bad behavior. I got drunk when I was 17 and came home in the middle of the night. I was grounded for a good chunk of my Senior yr...my brother did that w/ regularity from about 15 on...I can't recall him being grounded. Certainly not for many months. So, it felt like there was favoritism...and as the over-looked poor, poor middle child, I often felt like that. 

I'm sure some or all of that plus many unmentionables made me the spastic, over-bearing, tough-love, over-protective Mom that I am today. However, one thing they did that was very, very right...was never let us leave them or each other w/out saying, "I Love You". We said it as we left for school, for a friends house, on the phone, or even just leaving the room after having a little chat.

And really...in my opinion, that's the most important thing you can give a child. To make sure they feel loved, and are comfortable expressing this to the people in their lives. I have known too many people who don't say it often or at all to even their friends and kids. Most of them grew up with at least one parent who never verbally expressed love...so they carried that with them. I think FEELING loved is definitely important...but, saying those 3 words and hearing them...that's the most important thing you can pass down to your child.